So... when we last blogged we left you with the promise of more stories of beaches and snorkeling... we do have more stories of that... but the first couple are not exactly as lovely as we had hoped...
After leaving Krabi, we boarded a small boat, heading for Ko Yao Noi. We think the entire boat ride can be summed up by the fact that in order to board the boat we had to literally walk across a wooden plank that looked like it might snap apart at any moment... when Lindsey was told to walk onto the plank, she actually said out loud "you've got to be kidding" to which the older thai man replied, "no, it's very safe" -- yeahhhh righhhttt.
It should also be noted that the price of the hour-long boat ride, transporting us and all of our luggage, was three American dollars. Nice.
So we get to Ko Yao Noi, a very small Muslim island that is home to only about 3000 people. Needless to say there aren't many tourists on this island... we get to our guesthouse where we were staying in Bamboo huts right across the road from what looked like a lovely beach...
Not so much.
Although it was nice to be far away from throngs of tourists for a moment, our Bamboo huts were the most bug infested -- we had to sleep under a mosquito net which was totally ineffective since there were holes in it -- Lindsey ended up with ten bites on her feet alone and Josh had an even dozen on his left arm.
It was nearly two by the time we got the guesthouse and almost three by the time we had lunch... there weren't any activities planned for the day, so a bunch of our group decided to rent mopeds to cruise around the island -- since neither of us has an experience driving one, and Josh was way to afraid to learn on the fly, we decided to spend the afternoon hanging out at the beach... swimming and enjoying the sun, but...
It wasn't meant to be.
Apparently in Thailand low tide just doesn't mean that the tide goes out really far and the beach gets much longer. What actually happens is that the tide goes out really far and the beach, or what we thought was sand under the shallow water, gets revealed as actually being swamp-land disguised as sand. We ventured out into this "sand" to get out to the water... but quickly realized -- truthfully not quickly enough – that the sand was actually sinking under our feet in a mud-like fashion and we were being attacked by sharp shells and rocks. This wouldn’t’ve been so terrible is we could’ve just turned around and walked out of the swamp, but unfortunately out flip flops got stuck in the mud and then so did our feet and we were stranded in the swamp with nowhere to swim to clean off all the muddy sand that had accumulated somehow all over our body – especially on Josh’s back, no one knows how.
Ultimately, we did make it out of the swamp and vowed never to return again. Ha. (More on that later.)
So our entire group was out riding around the island and we were left with no good beach and no ocean to swim in and nothing to do on this tiny island except count our bug bites… (Lindsey left and then came back.)
That night we had dinner at our guesthouse, which was really the only place to eat on the entire island. Basically we just ate sweet and sour chicken at every meal.
The next morning, after being bitten all night – and yes, this did prompt many “Charlie bite me” impressions and variations – and, no there was no heat for the shower and the water inexplicably smelled like eggs – we took off with our group on a small wooden boat, heading out for more swimming and snorkeling. Our captain looked like the Thai version of Captain Jack Sparrow.
The best part of the day was being able to get to very small beaches and lagoons that were mostly empty except for our little group. It was absolutely gorgeous… paradise. We ended up having lunch on a little beach – no more than 20 feet wide and probably 100 feet long. Half the island was in the shade, perfect for an after-lunch nap, and there were caves to swim in and explore. Were it not for the sea lice that somehow found a way to always bite us after about ten minutes of being in the water, it would’ve been absolutely perfect.
When we got back to our beach, it was low tide again. (Uh oh) Our captain let us out as close to shore as possible… but this was still on the wrong side of the sandy swamp, making our entire group wade through it on our way back to shore. There was a lot of unhappiness and cut up feet after that unnecessary adventure.
After a shower and a beer, Lindsey finally got a ride around the island. Michael, one of the Australians from our first tour, happily took her out on the back of his bike. He drove like a very responsible adult. Haha. He even showed off the spot where Jules, one of the girls on our trip, had actually almost driven her bike off of the dock the day before – which, despite the inability to actually spend the previous afternoon swimming in the ocean confirmed our decision not to rent a moped. Jules was mostly unharmed – except for a bruise and nasty cut on her leg… but it could’ve been much worse and there are still skid marks in the cement near the dock on Ko Yao Noi island to prove it.
The next day we finally left the island, taking another boat trip to Phuket island, which is the largest and most touristy island in Thailand. This didn’t bother us since we are tourist and were happy to have beach chairs and umbrellas set up on the beach. Also, this time our hotel was really nice, the nicest we’d stayed in so far. It was big and clean and had air conditioning and warm showers. Amazingness.
The first beach we stayed at is called Karon, which was big and beautiful and full of people. There were people selling their wares on the beach – everything from brushes to remove sand, which made sense to us, to ice cream cones, which made more sense to Lindsey, to whistles made of bamboo, which really didn’t make much sense at all – but, for the record, we did see him sell at least one of them.
There was also a banana boat on the beach as well as parasailing and jet skiing. When we arrived to sign up to go jet skiing, we were asked to pay immediately and to sign away all liability, including any damage to the jet ski or ourselves. Lindsey was thrilled – Josh was nervous. Lindsey drove because Josh couldn’t see very well without his glasses. It was only half an hour – but it was awesome. Almost as much fun as the last time Lindsey paid a sketchy guy on a beach to ride his jet ski (Ya Acapulco. Hi Michelle!)
That night we had dinner with our group at the night market. Night markets primarily sell food – Thai food – and are usually only slightly sketchy. Even though before dinner we had professed that we were going to eat “anything but Thai food” we ended up joining our group in indulging in the local cuisine. Although we’ve been in Thailand for almost three weeks now, and have eaten our share of very good Thai food, we hadn’t eaten the street food… it all started with BBQ chicken on a stick, followed by spring rolls filled with potatoes and noodles, pad Thai, a sausage and even a banana and chocolate pancake for dessert… it was good. But Lindsey is still burping the sausage and it all might not have ended up sitting so well with either one of us. Yay for our first and last adventure with the street food in Thai land.
Later that night we got some hour -long Thai massages and headed to bed. The next day we had an entire day off just to relax and chill on the beach. We slept in late, got down to the beach, bought two beach chairs and an umbrella (6 American dollars for the whole day), and spent the rest of our time relaxing and swimming in the ocean. It was beautiful – but don’t worry Dad/Chuck: there are better waves in Santa Monica.
That night was our last with our tour group. We couldn’t believe it had flown by so quickly. Su, our amazing tour guide had organized an excursion for us to go see the Simon Cabaret. The cabaret featured an extensive cast of Ladyboys aka Thai drag queens, lip-synching to their favorite tunes which included a Dreamgirls medley, random songs in Chinese, Dina Ross’s I Will Survive, and our personal favorite (hi Don) Tina Turner singing Simply The Best. During one of the other numbers, which was a Thai song we had never heard of, one of the ladyboys came out into the crowd and planted a big kiss on Josh’s check. Don’t worry, he whispered “sorry” in Josh’s ear before doing so – and there is an amazing video of the event coming soon.
After the show, the Ladyboys assembled outside, still in costume, to take photos. They all seemed really eager to have their picture taken, calling people over to them. Of course we wanted to get one with Tina Turner, which we did and it’s awesome. But after the picture she turned to Josh and asked for a tip. Josh went to pull a 20 baht note out of his pocket, when Tina demanded a 100 baht. Even though 100 baht is only about 3 US dollars it is comparatively a lot to ask for. When Josh said he only had 20 baht, Tina got mad. Josh asked if she wanted the 20 or not and she indignantly said no. So we walked away and she didn’t get a tip – we think she really liked us.
Since that night was our last, after the show we took off to near-by Patong Beach, the party center of Phuket to have some more drinks and enjoy our last night together. Besides being a little dirty the biggest problem with Patong is that it is full of Thai prostitutes. There was a gross display of way too old men carting around way too young girls. Since all the bars seemed to be brothels we picked one and headed inside. It was awkward. There were scantily clad Thai girls pole dancing on the bars… also, it should be known that if you’re in a Thai brothel and a Thai girl asks you to play connect four, you might as well hand over some money right away because she intends to kick your ass in the game and make you pay for it… we still can’t decide if Connect Four is a game that allows anyone to cheat… there was also a weird game going on involving hitting a nail into a large wooden block with a really thin, weirdly shaped hammer. Apparently it was a race. No one really knows what was going on…
After realizing that maybe our little group was slightly out of place in this brothel we took off to find a more normal bar. We found an Aussie bar that had no prostitutes and went to drink there. Michael, our resident Aussie was very upset that this “Aussie Bar” was playing a football (soccer) game rather than Aussie rules – he wanted to complain the management. But, the soccer game was Chelsea versus Arsenal, which apparently is a very big deal. Chelsea won 2-1. Woo hoo. (Go Dodgers)
And that was the end of our tour… we said to goodbye to our group and are now on our own at a resort in Phuket. We are staying at the south east corner of the island at a nice hotel and we will moving to an even nicer hotel the day after tomorrow for our last two nights in Thailand.
The most eventful thing that has happened to us since leaving the tour involves Josh and some ear wax. Basically, Monday night after Lindsey pointed out that Josh had a lot of ear wax in his ears Josh used a Q-Tip (why?? WHY??) to clean his right ear and ended up pushing the wax further into it. He thought he may be going deaf. He is not. But it was quite an uncomfortable sleep for him since it felt like he had a cotton ball wedged in his right ear. This morning we talked to the people at our hotel about going to the hospital. They were very helpful, arranging a car for us to get there and making an appointment for Josh with the ear, nose and throat doctor at the international hospital. The hospital was very clean and much nicer than we expected. We didn’t have to wait very long and Josh was examined by a little Chinese doctor who spoke English and proceeded to quickly decide that Josh has an ear infection in both ears and then pull huge amounts of ear wax out of them with a little metal sucking device. Josh was very brave… (seriously) and walked away with clean ears and some ear drops. Good times. However he cannot put his ears underwater for our last few days at the beach. He’ll survive…
This afternoon we came back to the hotel and had Thai massages on the beach and then ordered room service for dinner and watched Little Miss Sunshine on the dvd player in our room…
Altogether we have four more nights in Thailand, all of which we will be spending on Phuket island, before we fly from Phuket to Bangkok and then directly from Bangkok to Beijing. We are getting really excited about China – Lindsey is currently reading a Traveler’s History of the country and obsessing over her Lonely Planet China…
Lots of love,
Lindsey and Josh
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